i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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