He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
as a side note pls kill me
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
