Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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