Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
