He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
