My brain says no but my pants say off.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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