Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize