I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
