I just saw a hot homeless man
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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