i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize