I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
