I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize