Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
