Im at strip club and am horny
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
