I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
she told me i tasted like america
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
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