dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
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