we have pet lesbian snakes
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
