ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
