"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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