Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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