Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
