I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
