He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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