need another drink. this is the easiest way
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
