He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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