she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
It's rum buckets o'clock
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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