Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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