He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
