The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
