My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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