I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
