last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize