New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
