How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
