We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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