im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize