he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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