btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
