we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I am mentally ready for anal.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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