she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
