We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
