dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Randomize