i just wanna soil my oats bro
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
