problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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