I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize