"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
