So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
