Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
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