shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize