break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Duck Duck Cougar?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Randomize
