Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Randomize