I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Hippo gnu deer
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
